I’ve been a member of various internet dating sites for about 3 years. I spend hours online waiting for someone to send me a “flirt” or a “wink”. I may exchange a few messages, but I still go to bed alone. I still wake up alone. I still spend 95% of my imagining what my “soulmate” is like. It may be selfish, but I ask God to send him to me. I don’t really ask for much. I just want him to love me and to respect me. I want him to love and cherish his children. Really, I just want him to notice me. I really want someone to notice me. I feel like I could go weeks without anyone noticing if I’m really here. Sometimes, I wonder if I am really here. Is this my life, or is it some strange dream that I cannot wake up from? I haven’t had a tremendous amount of tragedy in my life. I haven’t accomplished anything spectacular. I haven’t moved any mountains or written a song that the world sings. I just exist. There is no record of me in my senior high school year book. I’ve never loved anyone who’s loved me in return. I’ve never been somebody’s passion. I have faith that someday, somebody will see me from the inside out.